Dinner Table

FROM THE PREFACE… We grew up in a household that enjoyed wholesome, fresh, natural, unprocessed, and non-commercialized food. Our mother prepared all the meals, as was traditional in the 60s and 70s, with daily full course dinners made from scratch for our family of six. The gold standard for meals was plain and fresh. Our family did not consume carbonated drinks or sweet desserts at our dinner table. We drank water or juice, and had fruit that was in season for dessert. Our household also defied the myth that children dislike vegetables; we ate our fruits and vegetables without needing to be forced or bribed.

FROM CHAPTER 2, MIND YOUR MANNERS… We all strive to have enjoyable eating experiences with our family. They go hand in hand with delicious food and what we as parents hope for—“proper behavior” and “manners” at the dinner table.

No one likes to nag, but teaching manners to your children is well worth the effort. They will learn how to respectfully speak to others when you send them out on their own, and know how to behave in different social situations.

Teaching manners to children has grown to be more challenging in recent years, and even more necessary, in part because of technology. Kids and even parents need to learn or remember how to make eye contact. We are so used to looking at a screen and talking to others from a side profile. We’re all in such a hurry! We all tend to bring our iPhones, iPads, and electronic gadgets to the table.

We need to take a deep breath and put things into perspective. What we really want, deep down, is to develop our own best selves and, as parents, be the best possible examples. Take your children to a museum or restaurant and use such places to encourage the lessons taught at home. For every proper behavior noticed, cheer your children on, show them you are proud, and reinforce these good habits. After a few years of teaching manners consistently and often, you’ll be rewarded by how well adjusted and confident your family will be. You will enjoy dinnertime together in conversation, not in correction. You’ll be able to say to yourself, “I did my time!” Parenting is positively challenging. It’s a pleasure to know you can take your family anywhere and be proud. And your children can feel proud to take you anywhere as well!

FROM CHAPTER 10, THE FAMILY HEADQUARTERS… When you really think about the long history of homes, the kitchen has most always been the “family room,” the most popular room in the house. This is why we call our kitchens the family headquarters.

We did not have an island in our kitchen growing up, as most modern kitchens have today. Nevertheless, we hung out in the kitchen just the same. While our mother cooked and prepped meals and snacks, we found an area in the kitchen to watch, learn, and ask questions. We wanted to be where the action was. The aromas and creativity that took place in the kitchen made it a magnet for us all to stick around.

We had a fabulous chair in the corner of the kitchen (one of us still has it today) that we all fought to sit on. We sat on the counters as we talked to our mother sharing our day’s events. We had a junk drawer, tool drawer, funky closets, and our kitchen was kosher, with two sets of everything (but no dishwasher). As we grew, the kitchen became our atelier, apprentices to our mother’s mastery.

What is it about the kitchen that nobody wants to leave? It’s everything. It’s the heart of the home, the hub, the company, emotional comfort, the love in the cooking, the nurturing, creativity, aromas, a great place for conversation, and so much more. Everything happens in the kitchen. Food and love go together.

Most modern kitchens have an island and/or table to eat on, real estate not only for meals and snacking but also for socializing, meetings, homework, and projects. The family headquarters is the center of operations. We do magic in our kitchens. We believe that a happy family is one result of a well managed home, and we are always brainstorming the most efficient ways to keep our kitchen headquarters organized, well stocked, fun, and delicious. We want to share our ideas with you. They work for our families and can provide a starting point for your own creative brainstorms!

ONE OF “GENIA’S CORNERS”… Genia’s Corner: I have the most wonderful memories eating with my family at 6:00 pm every evening when my father returned home from work. My mother started to cook dinner at 4:00 pm when she returned from her own day at work. I sat on the kitchen counter as my mother cooked dinner, sharing my school stories, and she listened! She knew how to create the calm behind the chaos. This is what I want to achieve as well for my family. Family unity, stability, and calm! Getting to know your family can be done in a very creative and fun way.

ONE OF “LIZ’S CORNERS”… Liz’s Corner: By the age of 12, my mother and her favorite cookbook, Second Helpings, Please, were my two biggest influences in the kitchen. The Apple Tart recipe in that book was the first recipe that I experimented with. Forty-two years later, I am still experimenting and I still find myself referring to the original recipe. What Canadian Jewish home does not have this bible? What I have learned and realized in those forty-two years is that there is no such thing as a failed or bad Apple Tart. It does not matter whether you grate, slice, cube, or pare the apples. It does not matter whether you use sugar, maple syrup, agave, or brown sugar. It does not matter what kind of pie shell or tart you use. I have made every pie crust or shell possible. I have used decadent butter, sugar and flour. I've used ground almonds, shredded coconut, and dates. I have even used prepared pie shells from a freezer (not my proudest moment, but it worked). An Apple Tart is always a hit. When I am in my Picasso mood, I add pears. Sometimes I throw in cranberries, raisins, or shredded coconut. Regardless of how I make Apple Tart, I have never had to throw out a sliver. Who doesn't love Apple Tart, especially just out of the oven with ice cream?

ONE OF “MERLE’S CORNERS”… Merle’s Corner: Because of our Dutch heritage I have a personal connection to kale way ahead of the super health food status that it has today. Our mother came to Canada from Holland in 1956 and brought her Dutch culinary comforts. [Kale and Mashed Potatoes] was one of the dishes that we ate in the 1960s at our family dinners; this was also a winter dish at that time. To me, I considered this as one of our mother’s “old country” foods. Now I wish that I could let her know that I am making this dish at my family dinners.

ANOTHER ONE OF “GENIA’S CORNERS”… Genia’s Corner: Born and raised by European parents, we always set the table the way our parents set the table in their country, which was different from the tables of other families I knew, and that’s ok. I appreciate different! When I started to set my table in my own home, I always received comments that I was setting the table wrong, weird, and strange. I laughed it off. Being a creative spirit, I set the table the way I wish. It’s my creation and my funky ideas, as is the cooking in my kitchen. There are practical rules, though!